1,000th POST

G acting silly...dancing at daycare...sorta! (Video)

Jellystone Halloween

I just found this photo of the whole gang!!!

Swinging @ Daycare (Video)

Lots of GREAT stuff today. Today, is exactly ONE year from the moment I first saw Giorgia's Beautiful face. (see below) Ironically, Today, I also get the call from the Courthouse that Giorgia's Re-Adoption Papers were done! Yippee!! Just got back from the city were they were signed, sealed and placed in my hands!!! Then, to TOP my day off, my secret squirrel sent a video to my phone of my baby having fun at daycare!!!

One Year Ago TODAY!

Wednesday, November 5, (EXACTLY ONE YEAR AGO TODAY) I got "the call". It was a dreary day here and it was misting. Something told me that maybe this was the day and I took a photo of the trees across from my house as I jumped in the car. It was 6:30am and the darkness had just started moving away. My plan was to take photos every morning, never thinking that this was "the day". Unlike my fellow Precious Pandas, all waiting for "the call" I tried not to get to excited only to be let down another day. You see, all of our paperwork has been in China for over 32 months. Most of us started way before this and when we did, the process took only 6 months. So, for the past three years, every 6 months we were told/though, oh, just 6 more months.

The Rumor boards were quiet, all the yahoo groups were quiet...eerily so! How is it that the CCAA and the agencies have finally mastered the zip-lip technique when I'M expecting the call. My ECG girls & Precious Pandas are all speculating but nothing...all quiet.

At 2:00pm on the dot, my cell rings. Unkown area code??? No, My Agency area code?? Can't remember!! OMG!

I pick up the phone and

my FA says: Stephanie?

me: Phillip? Is this it? Is this the call? DON'T SAY ANYTHING!!! I'm on my way home!!! Can you call me back? BUT DON'T TELL ME ANYTHING YET!!!!

Phillip: (trying not to giggle) Yes, this IS IT, How long will it take you to get home?

me: 30 minutes

Phillip: Okay, no problem

me: You can call another family if you want so I don't hold you up, I'll understand and I'll be home waiting for your call. I hang up. Post to my group that I got the call, referrals are really here and that I hung up on Phillip and told him to call me later. Jump in my car and race home. Meanwhile, I'm getting all these texts saying "ARE YOU CRAZY, INSANE, STUPID...YOU HUNG UP ON THE CALL" I know, I know. But I wanted to be home and video tape it. Hey, I've waited for 3+ years, I think the least they can do is wait for me for 30 minutes!!!

So, I arrive home, oh did I tell you I'm sick as a dog with major resp. issues!! Thank God for adrenaline...I didn't feel a thing. I change my clothes, brush my hair, let Pirate outside, turn on the computer, turn on the video tape, review call sheet, look for lost "referral pen". (which I never did find) then wait... wait... and wait...

Finally Phillip calls me back. He waited for me to get home and didn't call anyone else. I was the first person he called...he didn't call anyone else yet. He said he sent the email with her photos and for me to open it up. I said no, I want you to tell me everything first because I won't pay any attention otherwise. I have no idea really what he said. I will have to reference the video.

The tidbits I got were:

It's a Girl

She's 10 months old.

Her birthdate is in January

Her name

She's from Guangdong

That's it!! He rambled for about 10 minutes but I have no idea what he said but I kept saying yes, okay, absolutely.

He then asks me to open the email and I say no.

I told him I wanted to do it by myself when I got off the phone but Thanked him for the call.

Then, I go to my computer and keep refreshing my email...

there is no email from Phillip.

Refresh, Refresh, Refresh... nothing

Then I decide to check my msn email...Then I see this...

This is it!!! And this is what I saw. Sorry that the video is so bad. I was trying to be cool because I had the video camera on me and my little camera taping my laptop as I opened the photo. Those of you that want to do this, might I suggest practicing. It didn't come out well but it's still memorable. The second I saw her I was in love and I kept saying that she looks like me. Something about her looks like me or it was her I saw in my dreams. She was so familiar. I must say Pirate was smitten too, you can hear him in the background. Stephe (yes, it's official, I'm a dork)

to be continued...

I will try to post referral video with the camcorder. At least it's clear video. Then more of that day!!!

Cinderella & The Witch

Best Friends

Ms. Rebecka sent these photos from her phone last week. Aren't they cute of the girls!!!

Having fun at Daycare. (Mia, Giorgia & Aubrie)

Just being silly.

Giorgia & Mia with Ms. Rebecka!

Thank you Rebecka, I am now fortunate enough to have an inside glimpse of my girl during the day!!!!!!!

Halloween Itinerary

Okay, so we started off with a parade down a couple of streets...

G's first "OFFICIAL" trick-or-treat piece of candy...

G and her partners in Crime...M & B!

Oh course...Princess was pushed from house to house. A Lady of Leisure need not walk...

Group photo of most of the gang...

Even my old boss got the Halloween Spirit...

I thought this was a cool shot below of one of the driveways to old neighbors house...

How do you explain to an almost 2 year old that Halloween is over...

Halloween 2009

More photos of trick-or-treating to come...

Halloween 2009

Daycare Parade

Just before lunchtime, Daycare had their annual Halloween Parade. I dressed up as a WITCH.

Here is G with one of her most favorite teachers...

Cute photos above but the reality was not pretty. From the moment I walked in G DEMANDED to be held by only me. I couldn't talk with anyone else, I couldn't put her coat on, I couldn't put my keys down, she wouldn't line up, hold her treat bag... just wanted to flip out. See below...

Okay, so when she heard the word "OUTSIDE" she let me put her down and accepted her treat bag...

She managed to walk outside with her fellow classmates...

And that was IT. TANTRUM until I picked her up...
So we only have photos that I could take while holding her...

Note to SELF: Next year I am coming to this Halloween Parade in a costume that she won't recognize me in and just be a bystander snapping away with a camera! Geez. Such Drama!

(Oh yeah, and when we had to change her out of her costume...she flipped out to. I handed a SCREAMING child over to her teacher and practically RAN out of there!)

Daycare Halloween Part 1

This morning Miss G started out as usually, her happy, yet demanding self. I put her slip on but decided to wait until AFTER breakfast to put on her costume...

I fixed her hair and decided to forgo the tiara until we got to school. Miss G is NOT HAPPY with this decision so I gave in...

Tantrum averted...

Now, I had to show her how pretty her tiara was!

Currently, we have NO self esteem issues. This is Miss G kissing herself...

Now we are at Daycare, Miss G drove of course...

Thanks Aunt Christie for the Princess Coat!

Now she is instructing me to put her sippies in the refridgerator...

Now we have a Princess smirk and a wave goodbye...

more to come...

G's Buddy

This is on of G's buddies at school, A. Her mommy is also one of G's old teachers. G misses Miss Shelley but because A is still in her class, she gets to see her at least twice a day!

Snacktime at School

Another email with this photo attached from the teachers assistant of G at snacktime.

At School

Here is one of a bunch of photos at school that Miss Rebecka sent to me via email. At least I know G is smiling for someone with a camera. All I've been getting lately is "NOooo" and the back of her head.

On the flip side, reverse physchology is working GREAT. When she doesn't do what I want her to do I say "FINE, give me your pretty bows!" and I take her hair bows out. Didn't you know that naughty girls aren't allowed to wear pretty bows?

She now fights for her BOWS!!! (most of the time)

Muffin Tin Monday

Just saw this over here at Her Cup Overfloweth
Thought I would give it a try although I am not following the theme of this week. I'll get there!!! lol

G LOVED it!

Fahionista

Memory Lane Monday

Foulkstone Road
1976 - 1982

Happen to be in the neighborhood this weekend. It's most beautiful in the fall and couldn't resist taking some photos! This is one of the homes I grew up in.

I know it looks pretty but all I see are those dreaded leaves. lol (I'm sure my parents would say the same thing!)

Too Much Halloween Candy?

Fill their bellies with a wholesome meal before they go out Trick or Treating. A healthy and nutritious dinner at home can keep them from emptying the bag before they get back.

Plan activities that don’t focus solely on candy and high-sugar treats. Carve a pumpkin, tell spooky stories, or create your own haunted house. Roast pumpkin seeds and watch a scary movie.

Limit the time spent going door to door, or limit the area they can cover. Maybe two hours, or maybe two blocks…

Give them non-food treats, like temporary tattoos or stickers, instead of high-sugar treats.

Trade them homemade treats for the candy they collect. Homemade is always safe, if you’re the one who made it. Try Pumpkin Spice Cookies or Spiced Sugar Pumpkin Cake.

Trade them healthier treats for their Halloween candy. Honey sticks or sesame candies from a natural foods store are always popular at my house.

Cash them out. Decide on the exchange rate for each piece of candy, and let them “sell” you their loot. Turn it into a homeschool lesson about currency or math or business.

Sort out the worst of the candy and get rid of it. Stuff full of high fructose corn syrup or from China should go right in the trash. (sorry China)

Keep the candy out of reach. Having a bowl of candy on the counter, or letting the kids keep it in their room is bad news…

Ration the candy. Set limits on the number of pieces they can eat on Halloween night, and ration the rest out at two pieces each day.

Decide on a date for pitching the rest. After a week or so, just get rid of it. Make sure the kids know in advance, so there’s no surprise.

Set a good example. Don’t pig out on the candy that you pass out to Trick or Treaters, and don’t eat all of the candy you bought from them in one sitting.

or do what I'm going to let G do...LET HER EAT SUGAR TIL SHE PUKES!!! LOL

Virus of some sort

Don't open any email that come from stephe(insert last name) @ msn .com.
I haven't had this email in a while so I don't know how this all started. Delete as spam and I hope it's not reaking havoc on your email. Please let me know if it is. Sorry. Stephe

Pumpkins

Dear John (Video)

Think I have to see this. Its from the same guy that did "The Notebook"

Amazing Story (Video)

You really have to watch this. I stumbled upon it on Catherine's Blog. It's AMAZING!

School Photo (last time)

I put this the same photo on this blue background...I think I like it better!

"MY" School Photos!!!

Well after many hours of searching on the internet, I found the background that was used on G's schools photos! Then tonight, before I put G to bed, I got her dressed back in her dress and took a bunch of photos of her in her room. After about 50 or so I had one that I thought would work. I think it did. Here is my result after a bunch of photoshopping! Do you like it better than the official ones at the bottom of the post???

"MY" Version of the School Photo

The "SCHOOLS" Version

S'mores Maker

Call me a sucker but I think I really want one of these!

Tired of broken crackers, runny chocolate, and flaming marshmallows from failed attempts at s'more making? Make perfect s'mores the first time, everytime, with the Microwave S'mores Maker! Simply stack your crackers, marshmallow, and chocolate under the cute, hand-like presses, fill the specially-designed water reservoir, and pop it in the microwave for 30 seconds or less. The water will ensure that your s'mores are evenly heated and lip-smackingly delicious! A great kitchen tool and a unique gift! 7"L x 6.5"W x 3.5"H. Made from plastic.

You can find it here. Isn't it just the cutest.

9 Months a Family...

Here are some photos of our first 9 months together. I got this idea from G's crib buddy Lilah Grace's Mom. (Great idea Jill!) My girl still does not favor smiling when the camera comes out but I assure you, she does.

Here is to many more months and years to come!!

Love you baby!

Biker Chick

Here is another of her many Halloween Costumes!!!

The Silver Metallic hot pants are just too cute on her!!!

Dutch Wonderland Part 4

G and Mama having a little photo op fun!

Uncle Jay won G a Sparkly Pink Fishie!!

Thanks Uncle Jay!

Aunt Christie keeping an eye on G...just like in China!!!

Attempting to get a photo of all three of the girls. I told Moorea and Brooke to jump on and squeeze tight to get G to stay. G didn't like that plan so much...

And within a second she was outta there!!!!!

Oh well, still a cute shot!

Dutch Wonderland Part 3

G did a lot of walking and just a bit in the stroller. Here she is on a mission in her sparkly "G" sweatshirt!

She reorganized the stroller basket when she was bored. Like the back of her sweatshirt? It's all sparkly rhinestones there too!!! She's my little goth girl!

Hanging out in the kiddie church.

Watching the Princess and the Dragon water show!

The dreaded Carrousel!

more photos tomorrow...

Dutch Wonderland Part 2

We got a late start on Sunday and G had a meltdown in the parking lot when we were getting out of the car...but it only lasted a few minutes. She was just tired of sitting in the carseat! She's a little unsure of what's going on but she's all set and ready to go!

Our first lesson of the day was patience. Although it's October and the lines were minimal... she was a big girl!

She got the hang of waiting really quick!

This was her ABSOLUTE favorite ride...Dukes Dozers!

Now if only she could figure out how to maneuver those dump buckets like the other kids!!

It was also farm animal today. They had all kinds of animals you could pet. Here is one of the mama cows that we saw!

more to come tomorrow...

Dutch Wonderland

More photos coming...

Jellystone Park

Here is my little Ladybug!

My girl on a mission. I just thought the bottom two photos were funny...super scary kids behind the sweet and innocent little ladybug. G was unphased.

A group shot of the girls, minus Charlotte. Aren't they just too cute!! None of these three characters scared G. She did eye them up though!

G's first Hayride. She was pretty much indifferent about the whole experience.

Some of the cool decorations we saw!

Dinner time! You know this was my girls favorite part. Notice the photo that is bottom right...yup...still has her appetite!

A fun time had by all.

Harvest Moon

Our First Harvest Moon together!

Flower Hat

Girly Girl

B!G P0PPA

They say this is his kids and his house. He's the middle aged man with the cigar...LIVIN' FAT!!!

Teen Cribs - MTV Shows

Wonder if it's true!!!

School Photos

School Photos Time! My girl just doesn't like anyone else but Mama taking her picture. Since she didn't smile on photo day they gave her another shot on the next day. Those are the two photos at the bottom of her in pink. Should I get any? If so, which one do you think I should get?

Another Day at the Park

Time to go... (Video)

My girl NEVER wants to get off the swing! Now combine that with a mom that likes to tease...

Now she's really mad at me!

The full blown tantrum happened when I shut off the camera and picked her up out of the swing. We had a little conference in the car and came to an understanding...for now!

Project Manager or Apprentice?

I finally bought a small shelf thing to make G her own little entertainment center that she can sit in front of and watch her DVD's. As I'm sitting on the floor putting it together G picks up the instructions and walks around to check out my work. I had the camera right there so I picked it up. Actually I was shocked! Seriously, she was like a 40 year old Project Manager checking to see if my work was up to par. Are you kidding?

So I made her put down the instructions and be my apprentice!

She slid the back in all by herself and tightened my screws!

Good job G!

That's my INDEPENDENT woman in the making!!!
No stinkin' boys needed here!!

Fancy Fun

Looking for suggestions on "wordart" for this layout. Sayings or Sentiments welcome, please post them in the comment section. Thanks.

20 Minutes Later...

Crocodile Tears (baby ones)

Pink Lady

Valentine's Day Trailer (Video)

I can't wait to see this...

Cul-De-Sac Fun

Fun at IKEA

G's first time in a ball pit...

Fun is not her forte...but we are working on it!!!

Okay, that's enough...

She would rather just clean up all the balls that the other kids threw out!

INSOMNIA...

I've got to stop cutting G's hair super short but I'm just not ready to loose the pigtails. So, I'm taking a poll, what style do you think she looks cute in? There are SHORT styles and LONG styles. You can reference row (1-3) and column (1-3). Thanks for playing!

SHORT STYLES

LONG STYLES

Baby Love

Addressing the Birthmother Question

I found this here on a blog that I follow. I am hoping that it is okay to repost since I am linking to that blog and giving the author credit. I know we are all looking to find our path regarding this topic. All I know for sure is that it will come sooner than we all think...

It's by Jean MacLeod, author of At Home in This World: a China Adoption Story

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"Mommy, why didn't I grow in your tummy?"

I looked my three-year-old daughter square in the face and gave her the speech that I had rehearsed in my head for as long as she had been mine. The speech was short, gentle and sweet. I told her about her birthmother in China, how much she had been loved and how much we loved her now.

"But, Mommy, why didn't she keep me?"

I took a deep breath and explained that I didn't know for sure, but that it might have had something to do with the China rule about having only one child. I described a few other possibilities and ended with my proclamation of faith – that we were meant to be a family, that I was sure that her birthmother wanted her to have a family for always, and wasn't it wonderful that we had all found each other to love.

Coming down from my poetic rhetoric, I smiled winningly at the tiny figure in overalls and waited for my hug and kiss. What I got: a look of icy outrage, arms folded in haughty disbelief, and an attitude that screamed "what a load of c***!"

I was unnerved. This was supposed to be a mother-daughter bonding moment where we celebrated becoming a family. A moment of sadness was allowed, but then things were supposed to be joyful and loving. Why was I feeling like I had tried to tell a sixteen year-old there really was a Santa Claus? And how could a three year-old see through all of my carefully worded, positive explanations? I believed what I was telling her about her birthmother... why didn't she?

She didn't because she had lived her story and somewhere, deep inside, she knew the whole truth. My "old soul" little girl understood that a happy adoption is built on a heartbreaking loss long before I did, and she was cutting me no slack.

Clearly, my daughter's birthmother wasn't going to be explained away. I slowly realized that I would be living with a powerful ghost of another mother, and that this ghost needed to be acknowledged, embraced, and disarmed. My daughter needed some sort of a relationship with her birthmother, and she needed me to have an understanding with her birthmother, too.

So, I invited my daughter's unknown, invisible, Chinese birthmother to tea.

Properly, of course, with a formal invitation dictated to me by my three year-old. In the backyard, we set up a child-sized table with three place-settings: tea-cups, cookie plates, and party napkins. Another tea-cup was quickly added for a favorite stuffed mouse who was a late RSVP. Lemonade tea was rapidly dispensed (formalities like small-talk pale with the preschool set when real teapot pouring is allowed), and we got right down to business.

"So, birthmother," I said to the empty chair to my right. "How are you doing" I'm thinking you might be missing your little girl. I know she misses you.?

My daughter nodded, and I asked her if she had any questions for her birthmom.

"Why did you leave me?" she asked directly to the space occupying the third chair.

"Why did you leave her?" I echoed. "Was it because you couldn't care for a baby? Did you have "big person" problems? It was a very sad thing for your baby girl. I think it might have been a very sad thing for you, too."

My daughter nodded vigorously.

We continued to chat about our day, the vast amount of Oreos eaten by Mousie, and the birthmother's magical trip from China? But my daughter was unusually quiet.

"Is there anything else you would like to ask your birthmother?" I inquired, watching her carefully as I pretended to sip my tea. My daughter went completely still, and I guessed at what she needed to ask and what she needed to hear.

"Birthmother," I said. "We want you to know that you are always welcome in our home and in our hearts. You are part of our family. But your little girl is *my* little girl to raise, and she will live with me until she is big and is ready to leave. You cannot ever take her back to China. This is her home now, and I am her mom, and I love her very much."

Then I left my child-sized chair to put my arms around the little girl with the enormous feelings; it is overwhelming to deal with big grief and big relief at the same time. In voicing my daughter's secret hopes and fears I had validated her connection to two mothers, and had begun my own long process of learning to deal openly with the painful side of adoption parenting.

The ghost? She still lives with us, mostly peaceably, nearly ten years later. We've felt her genetic legacy, as my daughter leaped into puberty. We've seen visions of her in the mirror, as my daughter grows into a beautiful young woman. Our joint acceptance of the ghost gave my daughter some power over her past, and allowed me to view the birthmother as an ally, instead of an enemy, during times that adoption compounded the emotional turbulence of adolescence. The three of us exist together, but only I remember that the three of us once attended a symbiotical summit meeting in the garden, and that we officially sealed our forever relationships with a splash of tea, and cookies.

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Copyright 2008, MacLeod, All Rights Reserved
Jean MacLeod is author of At Home in This World: a China Adoption Story, and co-editor of Adoption Parenting: Creating a Toolbox, Building Connections and mother of three daughters, two of whom were adopted from China through Children's Hope. From one adoptive parent to another, Jean shares her wisdom here in the monthly e-news and in the annual Children's Hope Newsletter.